Reflections from San Diego
All week I've been in the San Diego area, attending a National Pastors Retreat and a National Pastors Convention. Such righ stuff! I have experienced and learned enough to blog for a week or two!
I met with about 70 church leaders Monday night at a Mission retreat center in Oceanside. Ruth Haley Barton, who wrote the book, Sacred Rhythms (which I bought). She led us into a time of reflection, prayer and seeking God is solitude. Tuesday afternoon we spent four hours on our own, listening to God and journaling. What a powerful four hours! I havent' done this in years. For the first two hours I just couldn't seem to hear anything from the Lord. But when I finally settled down, I read a section of Ruth's book where she told a story of when she was on a plane and began to bask in the goodness of God. She just thanked Him over and over.
That's when the Holy Spirit gripped me -- both in conviction of my perfection, ingratitude and complaining spirit -- and in why I should be so grateful. I wrote pages and pages of things I thanked God for. I felt humbled and overwhelmed with the goodness and love of God. I basked in His grace and mercy and love.
I hope to take out time for solitude on a regular basis. Too often I'm so busy and always asking God for more and grumbling about the few things that aren't going well in my life, and thus miss all the amazing and awesome things that Jesus is doing in my life! I want to be with Him more.
How about you? Have you slowed down lately, let go of trying to control your life, stilled yourself before the Lord and allowed Him to speak into your life? I'd love to hear what He says to you and does in you.
Your friend on the journey,
Jim
posted by Jim Clark @ 11:56 AM
7 comments
7 Comments:
I am waiting to hear what he has to say, because I don't know what to do...
It is so funny that you bring this exact subject up right now! A few weeks ago, I felt that I had a very holy moment with the Lord. He has really been teaching me lately to just sit back and let him work, and boy have I been humbled and in awe of what he has done! Let me rewind back a little ways. It was a Monday afternoon about 2:00 and I was having incredible praise and quiet time in which I felt that I truly was sharing an audience with my Creator. The music and the lyrics to a certain song touched me so deeply I began to weep. It was such a cleansing and precious thing, just to cry in the presence of the Lord, knowing that he had already seen and taken my tears into his hands. After replaying the song and spending at least an hour and a half in prayer, my holy encounter was over, but you know how it is, I didn't want the Spirit to be squelched in any way! Immediately after my holy moment, I opened up my email and noticed that I had one from Katie Riggs, asking me to lead a shepherding group of 2nd grade girls. I had no idea what this opportunity held, so I called her. She told me that I would serve as a discussion leader and as a prayer mentor to these precious little girls. It was as if God was shouting at me!! I felt as though he had laid this opportunity right in my lap. We serve an incredible Father and I am thankful that if we are still and have the ears and heart to hear his still small voice he speaks so gently and tenderly to his children.
Lauren..that sounds so awesome..you will be an amazing light in those girls lives..I just love you for listening to hear where He wants you.
Jim - I believe more than anything else God wants us to spend time growing in intimacy with Him. He longs to be our first and last thought each day. He relishes and delights in every second of every minute of every hour we come to Him. I believe intimacy precedes fruitfulness. If I take the time to soak in His presence, whether in prayer or study or just sitting and letting Him wash over me, my day is more peaceful, I have more joy and it's way easier to love. When I don't take the time, I have cheated myself out of a great day. And believe me, I've had plenty of days that could have used a little more love, joy and peace. It happens all the time. When will I finally get it?
Amen, Candy!! Thank the Lord that he is so invested in us.
Jim,
Welcome home!
You and your blog were sorely missed! Your pastor's heart was missed so much the latter part of this week. I came here several times, hoping to see if you might have had a free moment to pass along a word to help soothe the pain of Kerri's homegoing. I'm so glad you're back. Even though you've not had a chance to blog about Kerri, knowing you and Susan are back is, in and of itself, of great comfort.
Questions:
Was the pastors' conference all CofC or did some local pastors of other fellowships attend as well? If others attended, per chance did you meet Dr. Tim Scott? He is the pastor of the church I attended in San Diego. He too has such a heart for unity in the body of Christ. You can't miss him, if he's within 5 miles - 6'5" with a voice that can be heard from La Jolla to the GasLamp. LOL
AND of course, a personal question. Did you bring a bottle of San Diego sunshine and topography for me? I'm falling in love with Abilene, but have to admit to still missing San Diego.
During quiet time this week I had what could be called an epithany. Intellectually, I've always believed in the indwelling of the Holy Spirit and of God being in us as we are in Him. However, this week the enormity of this truth hit me in a powerful way; of internalizing/truly accepting that God is present, accompanying me in everything I do and say. At the same time it became so painfully obvious that there are things in my life I'd prefer God were not so aware of, but then sighed in relief and overwhelming thanksgiving that He IS there, along with His mercy, grace and forgiveness. Were He not there, what a miserable incomplete human being I'd be.
This new awareness has had the effect and affect of stopping me cold in my tracks, be of thought or action, to consider if they are things I want to ask my indwelling God to witness - to, in a way, have Him step in a path I was considering traveling in - to ask myself if the proposed action or thought would make Him pleased with me or would grieve Him.
As has been said here, those quiet times are so powerful when God finally brings us into full relationship and communication with Him. What a time of awe, worship and thanksgiving.
Glad you're back, but even happier for you and for that special time with your LORD this week!!
I love to hear of all your quiet moments with the Lord! Lauren, Candy -- love your stuff on solitude. As one speaker said in San Diego, ministry without intimacy will become backbreaking. Intimacy without involvement in ministry leads to narcissism. We need both.
Kathy, I loved San Diego and truly missed living there. Did not see Tim Scott. Yes, it was an inter-denominational conference. Pastors and other church leaders from many fellowships. So rich.
Jim
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